Thoughtland

PK column in The National: So what does it mean to be ‘independent’ today anyway?

By Pat Kane. First published on FEBRUARY 23RD, 2019

THE word of the week is “independent”. From what, and to do what, exactly?

Those appalling Yessers among us (you know who you are) have already fanned out in satirical force. They are wondering, idly, whether at any point soon The Independent Group – the renegade squad of awfully sensible Labour and Tory MPs which launched this week – will even recognise that Scotland exists. Never mind the possibility of an “independent” Scotland. (Does that mean we’re a group too?) As for abuse, so far we’ve had The Funny Tinge Group Limited (this references both the racist solecisms of Angela Smith, as well as the weird company legal status of the group itself). I also saw “UKIG” (ho ho, excellent). Not to mention, if they ever manage to get some of their more beige Caledonians to turn, the Scottish Independent Party (anti-independence, of course).

PK column in The National: Churchill is at the centre of a culture war – but is he the leader we need?

By Pat Kane. First published on FEBRUARY 16TH, 2019

THE story passed down about my Gran Kane was that she snarled at the mention of Winston Churchill.

One of her Irish family was murdered by a member of the Black and Tans, a regiment Churchill formed when he was British secretary of war in 1919. Recruited largely from shell-shocked Great War soldiers, the Black and Tans struck terror into rebellious Nationalist communities in the North of Ireland.

So even before I became a perfidious independista, inherently sceptical of the call to “Great British” anything, we had a familial line on the great war hero Winston Churchill.

PK column in The National: Scotland can use its big long spoons differently to get out of Brexit deal

By Pat Kane. First published on FEBRUARY 9TH, 2019

‘I’VE been wondering what that special place in hell looks like, for those who promoted Brexit, without even a sketch of a plan how to carry it out safely.” Thus did the President of the European Council, Donald Tusk, wring some extra harrumphing (is that even possible?) from the Brexitannia Chorus the other day.

But I detect a jolt of extra outrage, coming from the specific imagery that Tusk deployed. Coincidentally, as the news flashed everywhere, I was listening to the excellent Talking Politics podcast from the London Review of Books.

PK column in The National: Never mind the blitz spirit ... could rationing be just what we need?

By Pat Kane. First published on FEBRUARY 2ND, 2019

BREXIT gets weirder and weirder. And you can rely on the bookies to put a price on it. A few days ago, Paddy Power opened a line on “what the British Government would officially ration first in 2019”. Fuel came top at 4/1, olive oil and bread at 16/1, chicken 66/1, prosecco 125/1.

Next in my twitstream (never better named) was a punter vox-popped by the BBC. Asked about retailers’ warnings of empty shelves after a no-deal Brexit, he suggested that, as far as he was concerned, “it would do the country good to go without for a little while. Make them appreciate what they’ve had”.